Mobbing or not? On leadership mistakes that burn out your best performing people.

You’re giving 200%, but suddenly… you’re not being heard. Something changes, but no one says it out loud.

Many of us have been there. No confrontation. No raised tone. No clear message.
But the air gets heavy. Trust dissolves. Stress grows. And motivation quietly turns into resignation. That’s the road to burnout.
And most of the time, the signs were there — we just didn’t name them.

The silent symptoms we ignore.

Burnout rarely arrives all at once. It builds up through micro-experiences: ignored feedback, shifting priorities, being left out of key decisions, unclear communication and feeling devalued or sidelined.

Eventually, even the most committed team member stops trying — not because they’re lazy, but because they’ve stopped believing their effort matters.

Quiet quitting starts long before people actually leave.

HR calls it quiet quitting. But before employees disengage, they feel lost in mixed messages, unsure what’s expected of them. They’re told they’ve reached their potential — yet new opportunities never materialize. Or worse: vague promises lead nowhere.

Leadership mistakes that hurt the most.

It often comes down to management style. And the most damaging behaviors aren’t about bad intentions — they’re about missing skills:

• „Don’t question it – just do it”. Shutting down communication.
• „We’re all overwhelmed”. Pressure instead of dialogue.
• „Maybe this job’s not for you”. Ignoring burnout.
• Making decisions behind people’s backs.
• No recognition – not even a “thank you”.

Most of these result from a lack of leadership tools for handling a conflict, a crisis or a change. But even without bad intent, the result is the same: turnover, absenteeism, low morale – sometimes even legal cases and brand damage.

What should HR do when someone raises a concern?

A solid HR response includes:

• Ensuring emotional safety.
• Collecting objective evidence.
• Assessing whether it’s a conflict or mobbing.
• Coaching, mediation, and conversation support.
• Addressing the leadership gaps and fixing toxic dynamics.

Ignoring this process risks not just lawsuits – it damages trust, loyalty, and culture. And yes, retaliation is illegal: under the EU Whistleblower Directive, U.S. federal laws like Title VII and SOX and Article 18^3e of the Polish Labor Code.

 What can you do as an employee?

1. Observe yourself – burnout is not weakness, it’s a survival signal.
2. Document everything – calendar invites, emails, meeting notes.
3. Speak up – even an informal talk with HR can leave a trace.
4. Don’t stay in the victim role – see Karpman’s Drama Triangle.
5. Find support – therapy, a mentor or a trusted colleague. You don’t have to face this alone.

What can organizations do?

• Train managers in communication, empathy, and crisis leadership.
• Foster a culture of feedback and trust (hint: try the Trust Equation).
• Set up internal prevention mechanisms.
• Track the early signs – HR data (e.g., eNPS, feedback, absenteeism) doesn’t lie.
• Ensure fairness – not just in pay, but in regarding decisions and communication.

The consequences? Sometimes irreversible.

It’s not just about people leaving – it’s about what remains. The mood. The trust. The silence. The damage to the culture. Bad leadership decisions, failure to act and ignoring the warning signs remain in an organization’s DNA for years to come.
But it can be different. With enough empathy given, with a tad of courage, and with a willingness to listen and grow.

Going through something similar?

You’re not alone. Let’s talk about it.
📩 Got a story to share? Write to me. Maybe we can change the way companies work – together.

👉 If this article sounds familiar – whether you’re an employee, manager or HR – let’s connect.
I help companies identify silent crises before they become burnout, turnover or legal cases.
Workshops. Training. Honest, practical conversations.

Reach out – and let’s see what we can fix, together.

Big thanks to my amazing peer Ola from Kursy języka angielskiego online – ATL English by Aleksandra Ammer for her support and proofreading!